Instead of talking about milestones right now, I'm just going to tell you that I adore being your mom. Sometimes I question how good I am at all this. I worry that you got the short end of the stick because I do not knit, or sew, or garden, or all the other things I thought I would know how to do before I became your mom. What I do know how to do is take your picture (as of today I *might* have taken 2019 of you). I also know how to hold you just right so you will fall asleep. I know how to make you laugh that real, belly laugh that sometimes turns into a snort. I know how to make you stop crying when you're upset. I know the signs you give when you need a nap. I almost always know when you have a diaper in need of changing. I know what toys and books are your favorite and I know that you love listening to music. I know how to make your baby food and even if you're just as happy eating the stuff out of the jars, I know you like the homemade stuff better. I know that things like having the breeze in your face, touching a flower, and standing up positively delight you. I know how to be your mommy. I know that you love me back as much as I love you and that you have no idea what my shortcomings may be.
Last month I was talking to a girlfriend of mine and I actually said being a mom was easy. It's not easy. I second guess myself daily and I always worry I'm not good enough... but being your mom is easy in that it all feels so natural. We are a good fit, baby girl. You make me forget the hard days. You make me a stronger person. You make me strive to be more. As you grow and learn and reach your milestones, I feel myself doing the same thing in different ways.
I am so proud of you and I know that you're proud of me too.
I love you, Zo-Zo Monkey!