Friday, April 17, 2015

Plate Spinner

I was driving home yesterday - thinking about the last ten months, this weekend, next week, the next few months, etc. I was mentally writing my "Things to Do" list and calculating what my strategy would be to stay sane through it all (no luck there, btw) when "Plate Spinners" popped into my head.

You know plate spinners, right? Those amazing people who spin all these plates on sticks. It's a circus act - dozens of plates up in the air. Audiences watch with anticipation - breath held, waiting for a plate to fall. 

Some of us spin more plates than others. Some of us support the weight of other plate spinners - holding them on our shoulders, in the palms of our hands, on top of our heads - as they try to balance their own plates. We work together (or in spite of each other) spinning and balancing and sometimes a plate falls. Sometimes it feels like all the plates are going to come crashing down, but you slowly pick up the plates and you rebuild.

I have friends with different plates. I have friends with some of the same plates that I have and then they have even more plates. These friends take my breath away. I have one particular friend who has SO many plates and she spins them expertly. She's the person you want spinning plates with you. She will hold you up while standing on one foot and let you climb on top of her head if you need her to. If she spins a plate for you, she does it with all her heart. Your plate is fragile and important to her. I've never seen her turn away a plate, even if it is the ugliest, heaviest plate - a platter, really. She will take that platter and throw something amazing on it and you'll wonder why you didn't think of that.

I am lucky to have people in my life who recognize that I have a lot of plates. They also have a lot of plates. But they check on me and my plates. Sometimes they take them from me and sometimes they offer their support, or bring me a snack, or they give me permission to voice my frustration before they encourage me to get back to what I want to do. Sometimes, they encourage me to just put a plate down for a while (or forever) if that's what I really need to do to save all the other plates.

I hope that they know I would do the same for them, always. 

This afternoon, I made myself a list of my plates. I stopped somewhere around 75, but I could have gone on and on. There are days where I beat myself up because I am not the person I strive to be. I don't always meet my high (impossible) expectations for what I "need" to be doing. I forget that I am pretty amazing - balancing all these "plates". Sometimes I might lose my balance, but I haven't broken any of my most fragile plates and I call that success. 

Plate spinning isn't easy.

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Ten months.

These girls are two days shy of being ten months old and I absolutely cannot believe it. Two more months of them being babies and then... oh, who am I kidding? They will always be our babies. Our last babies. The two who showed us that everything we thought we totally knew about babies was good and all, but they were different. Different from Zoe and Finn - and yes, different even from each other. These last ten months have gone by so fast, and I have this feeling that the next two will go by even faster. I'm not ready, but at the same time, with every milestone and every day of growth, we are further from that scary time when I was pregnant with them and when everything seemed so out of our hands during Charlotte's time in NICU and CVICU. Every day moving forward feels like a little victory celebration. Their being here -  healthy and happy - is a testament to how strong our girls are and to how capable and tough and loved the entire Emery family is. It's been quite the journey and I am proud of all of us and excited for wherever the road leads to next.

So - speaking of journey and the last ten months... I have a little project I'm working on. The girls nursery (you know, the one they started actually sleeping in last month!) is a work in progress. We keep adding things here and there, but there is a wall above their changing table that has nothing on it at all. What I want to do is create an art wall and I was hoping you guys could help us. 

As part of their birthday celebration, I'm asking our friends and family to create* art for their wall. If there is really no art medium you are comfortable with, we'd also love quotes on cards, postcards, etc. that I can frame and hang up. 

We'd like to stick with the following themes:

- Travel (journeys, maps, transportation, landmarks)
- Hearts 
- Sisters/Twins/Best Friends
- I love the idea of doing something that indicates where everyone who is special to our family lives. I might end up taking a map and using pins. I was also thinking of framing postcards from where our loved ones are: Bakersfield, Burbank, Seattle, Austin, Washington DC, etc, but I would need those sent to me. I have a Bakersfield one somewhere, but it says "Bakersfield Sucks" so... I'm not so sure about that one. ;)

Anyway. That's my big idea! Our friends and family have been so giving of their love and support for our girls and our entire family and I can't think of a better way to celebrate that than to fill this blank wall I've been staring at with art from you so the girls can enjoy it every day. I can already imagine pointing out pieces to the girls and them learning who each piece is from. 

*If you're up for painting something, message me and I would be happy to send you a 5x5 or 8x10 canvas. :)