Inevitably Keely

Today is my last day of being 30. Tomorrow, I will be 31. Crazy how that works out. 30 was a good age for me. We finally conceived Zoe (September 4!). I was pregnant: (The morning we found out) I was in The Full Monty and did the Cha Cha every weekend for four weeks with "all day sickness". I got closer to friends here in Bakersfield. I had an awesome vacation in San Diego with Daniel. I took some cool photos. I mended some fences. I grew. Literally: I think I became a better person, wife, friend, daughter, mother. I laughed a lot and cried a little. I was happy. I learned a lot. I ate better. I enjoyed the little pleasures and appreciated life's gifts even more. I finally learned to not be a baby about shots, getting blood drawn and IV's. I had a baby. I drank a lot of coffee, lost a lot of sleep, took as many naps as I could and got to see what an amazing father my husband is. I strived to be the best mom I can be. I learned to take "me time". And last...

You are now 3 months and 4 days old. I’m five days late writing this letter, I know. I’ve been too busy gawking at how amazing I think you are, giving you lots of hugs, feeding you and taking your picture to sit down and write you a letter. Oh, and while I’m confessing, you should know that I haven’t touched your baby book since the nurse put your hand and foot prints in it. I know. Horrible. But I do write you these letters and I do have big plans for that darn book, you’ll see. In the last month, your dad and I have really started to see your personality come out. You’re like your mother, and your Nana K, and my Nana (OK, and all your great-aunts) in that you really use your eyebrows to express yourself. You alternate between the left and right eyebrow and sometimes you have both of them up at the same time, almost to say, “What the HELL are you people doing?!” Sometimes you get this concerned look like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. It’s not, baby… that’s what your m...

My little family is taking a trip to San Diego today to be with my family. (Heya Mom! I know you read this, so there you go. We love you guys. See you tonight) I'm not one for sudden/unplanned trips (not anymore). Trips with Zoe usually take more planning, but Daniel and I felt like my parents needed some baby lovin' from their granddaughter. I'm not going to get into detail here because my dad just doesn't get the whole blogging thing and would probably hate for me to write about it here. All I'm going to say is, cancer sucks ass. And that there might come a day where I have to write more on that topic here because this is my outlet. I censor myself all the time because family reads this and I don't want to shock them, but I need this venue. I process stuff by writing about it and I'm suddenly feeling like I'm processing a lot. Of course, my dad would say I should keep it private. Maybe he's right, but I've benefitted from other people writing a...

I could write about all the things keeping me busy lately, but the truth is: Zoe is the biggest, best reason I haven't felt like blogging lately. Back to regular blogging soon. I promise.

Zoe trading card: Because what else am I going to do at this hour? We've been up for three hours now.

In the interest of complete honesty, I'm going to come clean. Zoe has not slept through the night for the last six days. Nope. Not once. Apparently, if you take my baby on a weekend out of town you're going to totally screw with her schedule and screw yourself in the process. I'm stumped. And exhausted. And looking back at that post where I talked about our schedule with a little bit of nostalgia for the good ol' days and a little bit of contempt. And now for somne live blogging: Zoe and I are sitting out in the living room right this very moment. We've been out here for thirty minutes so far and I imagine we'll be here for at least another hour or so. She's slipping in and out of sleep. She has it made: mama's lap, binkie, some laptop mood lighting. She just spit her binkie out and is still sleeping... looks like I might be able to go to bed sooner than I thought. She is adorable, you know, She just smiled in her sleep. Oh! And she's awake again. Da...

I took Zoe for her two month check up yesterday morning. She did great during the exam; cooing and smiling. Her doc says she's a healthy baby. She also said Zoe was "huge" the instant she walked into the room, which sort of bugged me. The pediatrician has a way of making things sound negative when they're not. I end up getting paranoid and asking if I'm doing something wrong and then she back pedals and says everything is fine. She says Zoe is in the top 75 percentile for weight and length - and we're not feeding her too much. She's a good size for her age and she's growing at a good rate. Yay us! Birth weight/length - 8lbs 5ozs./ 19 inches Last month - 10lbs 5ozs./ 21 inches Today - 12lbs 3ozs./ 23 inches That was the easy part. It was not easy watching Zoe get her shots. It was really hard holding Zoe's legs down while the nurse poked her. Our baby has some strong legs and she likes to kick; add being poked four times with needles and you have on...